As I think about what happened four months ago at Sandy Hook some very solemn thoughts come to mind. I began to think of my feelings as well as the feelings, comments, and commentaries voiced by the public about the person who committed the dreadfully heinous act. Words such as evil, disgusting, vile, sickening, and despicable don’t even begin to describe the names that have been associated with the shooter. The mindset and makeup of one to commit such a brutal atrocity cannot be measured, described, or understood. But for all the evil descriptions I can imagine to ascribe to the shooter and for all the thoughts of disgust we can attribute to him – they all faint in comparison to how God views my sins. Me, Olu Bolden. When I fall short, when I don’t do what I’m supposed to do, when I stray from what I’m supposed to be doing; the Almighty, Holy God views my sins more abominable than we do view the Sandy Hook villain.
I am not, nor have never been perfect. Over my short years on this earth I have disappointed my family, friends, myself, and most importantly God. I’ve done things that to this day I am ashamed of. It’s easy for me to “throw the first stone” at those who perform openly, heinous and popularly consented vicious crimes. But when I attempt to view my sins as God views them, I attribute some of those same descriptive words to myself. Subconsciously (and sometimes consciously) I get caught up in the “boy, I’m better than that guy,” but in reality I am a vile, heinous, sickening sinner – that has been saved by grace. God’s saving undeserved display of goodness and kindness to me. I deserve only punishment and death for what I’ve done, but because of His great love for me I am rescued from warranted peril. The Holy Christ appeased the Holy wrath of the Holy God by dying for me. And not just dying, but raising up in glorious and powerful victory; the same glorious and powerful victory that is given to me to be able to live a victorious, sin-free life. Looking at my sins the way God views them helps me to walk worthy of the mission which God has called me to.
I am not, nor have never been perfect. Over my short years on this earth I have disappointed my family, friends, myself, and most importantly God. I’ve done things that to this day I am ashamed of. It’s easy for me to “throw the first stone” at those who perform openly, heinous and popularly consented vicious crimes. But when I attempt to view my sins as God views them, I attribute some of those same descriptive words to myself. Subconsciously (and sometimes consciously) I get caught up in the “boy, I’m better than that guy,” but in reality I am a vile, heinous, sickening sinner – that has been saved by grace. God’s saving undeserved display of goodness and kindness to me. I deserve only punishment and death for what I’ve done, but because of His great love for me I am rescued from warranted peril. The Holy Christ appeased the Holy wrath of the Holy God by dying for me. And not just dying, but raising up in glorious and powerful victory; the same glorious and powerful victory that is given to me to be able to live a victorious, sin-free life. Looking at my sins the way God views them helps me to walk worthy of the mission which God has called me to.
"But God - so rich is He in His mercy! Because of and in order to satisfy the great and wonderful and intense love with which He loved us, even when we were dead (slain) by [our own] shortcomings and trespasses, He made us alive together in fellowship and in union with Christ; [He gave us the very life of Christ himself, the same new life with which He quickened Him, for] it is by (His favor and mercy which you did not deserve) that you are saved (delivered from judgment and made partakers of Christ's salvation)." - Ephesians 2:4,5
Thank you God for Your love, Your mercy, and Your grace. Help me to live a life pleasing to you.
